If parenting is tough, co-parenting is even tougher. Often stepparents don’t feel like they can discipline their partner’s kids and, if they do, they might bring down the wrath of the biological parents. All in all, things can get pretty complicated.
One woman’s stepkids not only show her zero respect but trash her house every time they stay over for the weekend. When she brought this up with their father after a year of putting up with it, he flipped out, then moved out. She’s since turned to netizens for support.
More info: Mumsnet
RELATED:Co-parenting comes with complications, as this stepmom is finding out the hard way
After a year of putting up with her stepkids trashing her home and showing her zero respect, she decided to speak up
At her wits’ end, she quietly expressed her unhappiness to her partner, but he was less than supportive
He snarled at her that they’re just kids and that’s what they’re like, before accusing her of being unreasonable
When she was still upset the next day, her partner threw a fit and told her he was packing his bags, leaving her to ask netizens if her complaints were out of line
Blending families isn’t always smooth sailing, but OP never expected voicing her frustrations would end her relationship. After a year of tolerating appalling behavior from her stepkids, she finally cracked—only for her partner to dismiss her concerns entirely and spring to his kids’ defense.
The stepkids, aged 11 and 14, ignore OP, trash her house, and loudly game non-stop, making it impossible for her to enjoy time in her own home. When she expressed her distress over their bad manners, though, her partner snapped, calling her unreasonable. He then loudly declared his kids would never be back—and packed his own bags too.
OP’s mom has told her that step-parenting comes with “baggage” and that her partner’s kids would always come first. Left devastated, OP turned to an online community to ask if she’d been too harsh, or whether enough was finally enough.
It would definitely seem that OP’s partner and his kids don’t know the first thing about boundaries. In her long list of complaints, many include situations where her stepkids have blatantly overrun her attempts to set some house rules, and her partner seems to have no problem with it. It’s clearly time for OP to move on and reclaim her life, but how?
In her article for Psychology Today, Tonya Lester writes that, if you’ve been left, there’s a natural tendency to ruminate on painful memories and question your lovability. According to Lester, unworthiness, shame, and isolation are our most painful emotions, and being broken up with might trigger all of these feelings simultaneously.
“When we go through a breakup, we have essentially lost a big part of what had been our life and finding a new normal and grieving our old life can be particularly challenging,” says Emily Mashburn in an interview for VeryWellMind.
In a post on the Breakup Breakthrough website, the author suggests several ways to take back your life after a breakup, including going no-contact with your ex, implementing daily practices like stretching, journaling, or meditation, learning something new, creating something, dating yourself, and taking a solo trip.
From what OP tells us, we certainly think she’s better off without her ignorant partner and his rude and unruly kids in her life. Perhaps now she can peacefully pick up the pieces and rediscover a life worth living free of constant disrespect.
What would you do if you found yourself in OP’s shoes? Do you think she was being unreasonable, or is enough enough? Let us know your opinion in the comments!
In the comments, readers agreed the woman was not being unreasonable and slammed her childish partner for doing a lousy job of parenting
