Our society has an imaginary handbook of cultural guidelines that are understood and followed by most. You won’t ever find a physical version, and the rules are rarely mentioned in a casual conversation – however, every human is aware of its existence. There are unspoken rules for literally every aspect of your life: a friendship, relationship, parenthood, etc. – yet today, we’ll be strictly focusing on the rules that hide behind manhood.
“Men of Reddit, what are some unwritten rules we have?” – an online user took it to one of the most famous and well-liked online communities to find out what unspoken manhood laws are there. The question received over 4.4K upvotes and 3.7K worth of comments revealing the rules that every self-respecting man will follow to the end of his days. Make sure to comment below if there’s something that members of this online forum missed!
More info: Reddit
#1
When walking upstairs behind a woman, the stairs instantly become the most interesting thing.”Hmmm, these stairs are really made out of stairs huh”
#2
Whenever your friend is cooking on the bbq, you have to stand next to him and talk about how amazing this food is gonna be
#3
A big bag of soil, dry dog food, or rice must be slapped.Tongs for BBQ must be clicked 2-3 times before using them.
#4
When you’re strapping down a strap, you must say “that’s not going anywhere” or you will lose everything on the trailer
#5
Beer and pizza/BBQ is acceptable payment for helping another man work on his house or vehicle.
#6
When your friend’s crush is around, he is the funniest in the group
#7
Don’t throw a friend under the bus to impress someone. Ever.
#8
If a friend buys you a drink you don’t pay it back you just buy the next round
#9
The best test of a friendship is when you defended someone in their absence and vice-versa.
#10
A grunt and a nod is an entirely acceptable conversation.
#11
If a bathroom has 5 urinals, it only has 3 urinals.
#12
If your boys’ sister is in trouble, protect her like your own.
#13
For those that live with women: No matter what you are going to the grocery store for, just buy toilet paper.
#14
Don’t poke fun at the way a man makes his income.
#15
*up nod* What’s up?*down nod* you have my respect*right nod* we need to chat*left nod* come check this out.
#16
Don’t be scared to give compliments, we keep them in our “permanent memory” area.
#17
When our balls stick to our thigh we have to take a big step to unstick them
#18
It’s is essential that we pee away the small bit of s**t on the side of the toilet bowl.
#19
Give respect until they prove they do not deserve it.
#20
NEVER DM a woman for sex(maybe unless in a specific subreddit for that kind of stuff). Don’t be so thirsty as to harass women
#21
You can have a beer. But not if it’s the last one.Don’t roast a man in front of their kid.
#22
dont you f*****g dare start a conversation in the public bathroom
#23
If a man brags about his garden, you let him talk, don’t interrupt him saying yours is better
#24
If you are holding a stud finder, first thing you do is hold it to your chest and making a beeping noise
#25
Don’t be funnier than your friend when he’s trying to impress a girl.
#26
I’m gonna add another urinal rule.While you’re peeing you’re allowed to fart uninhibited without acknowledgement and we won’t say s**t.But, once you’ve zipped up and head to the sink, that window has closed.You can still fart but, you can’t just act like it didn’t happen.
#27
Never touch another man’s fries.
#28
Never make eye contact with another man whilst eating a banana.
#29
Don’t hit a man in the balls. Just don’t.
#30
dont “jokingly” put down your friends whenever a girl is around just so you can seem like some kinda alphachad, especially if they like the girl
#31
You MUST cringe every time you see another man get hit in the balls. If sitting crossing the legs as an additional response is acceptable.
#32
To look away when a girl is doing “certain” workouts at the gym
#33
If you ask me about my feelings, I’ll definitely be thankful and reply in an enthused manner. So don’t do that.
#34
you can have the last slice of pizza; you can have the last beer. but you can not have both.
#35
It’s better to look stupid (in some situation) than to actually be stupid.Also, who tf had *written* rules?
#36
Always give a firm handshake. People will think you are weak if you don’t.
#37
Don’t f**k with another man’s vehicle.
#38
Don’t pee on electric fences or another man’s mother.
#39
As soon as the house is empty( family depart), upstairs we go to de stress, giving the rest of the day the freedom and clarity it deserves.
#40
Double tap the drill to make sure it has power
#41
When having a heart to heart with a bro. Don’t keep it too serious remember to also joke and make your bro smile.
#42
If you secured something, you must slap it and say “it’s not going anywhere”!
#43
If he’s flirting with her, we don’t interrupt until he takes a p**s
#44
If you introduce someone and say he’s a friend of yours he’s to be treated with respect.If you say he’s a friend of ours then you can talk openly in front of him.
#45
There is a line that men can innately feel. Its a line you dont cross, and you know if you do, things could get physical.Women cross those lines all the time, but men know you might get punched in the face.
#46
Don’t cross streams.
#47
If your buddy’s wife or girlfriend asks if he was with you, you say yes. Always.Then asap talk to your buddy and find out what’s up.If he’s cheating or treating her like s**t, then have a talk and get him to get his s**t together.But the original question always gets a “Yes, he was”.
#48
If it’s a regular fight over a disagreement or something stupid that was said: no hair pulling, no nut shots, no eye gouging and no fish hooks.
#49
If it ever comes up, all my bros are hung like mules.
#50
Never, ever date your friend’s ex or the girl he wants.
#51
If someone makes a good pun you must express disgust and ask them to leave, and the guy after you must comment r/angryupvote.