The United States is a fascinating place. Where else can you find stunning beaches, amazing mountains, vast deserts, spray cheese in a can and some of the most patriotic people on the planet? The U.S. will always hold a very special place in my heart, and I’m convinced that I’ll never find tastier peanut butter anywhere else in the world.
But just like any other country, there are a wide range of citizens, spanning from brilliant scholars with PhDs to people who probably shouldn’t have access to social media. We took a trip to the [Stuff] Americans Say subreddit and gathered some of their funniest screenshots below. Keep reading to also find a conversation with one of the moderators of the group, and please remember, pandas, that these posts are all in good fun!
#1 To Remember How Many Feet There Are In A Mile, U Just Gotta Use 5 Tomatoes
#2 “People Who Leave Their Phones Set To Military Time Are F**kin War Criminals”
#3 Will Europeans Be Suprised About My Mixed Heritage?
Whether you’re from the United States or not, there’s a good chance you know quite a bit about the country. American media tends to dominate movie theatres and Netflix accounts across the globe, and I have yet to visit a country where I didn’t hear American pop music playing on the radio or in a random grocery store.
But one of the downsides of having all of this exposure is that the country becomes the butt of many jokes too. And if anyone gets caught posting ignorant remarks online, there’s no chance they’ll get away with it. That’s where the [Stuff] Americans Say subreddit comes in. This group has amassed an impressive 675K members since its creation in 2013, and it never seems to run out of content.
#4 “You’re Gonna Mansplain Ireland To Me When I’m Irish?”
#5 “I’m Norwegian (Not From There But Grandpa Is)
#6 “Can Anybody Tell Me If Portugal Has Running Water Like In The States?”
To find out more about [Stuff] Americans Say, we reached out to the group’s moderator team. Lucky for us, one member was kind enough to have a chat with We and share some background info about the community.
“It seems to have been started in 2013 by a British user who also created a number of other subs around the same time (e.g. r/britishproblems, r/metal, r/worstof, r/america etc.). It was quickly followed by r/[Stuff]EuropeansSay, which seems to have been set up by someone who objected to this sub, but is now moderated by many of the same people as this sub.”
#7 “Real Brave Of You To Insult Our Military”
#8 “This Is America Gotta Speak English”
#9 I’m Italian And This Hurt Me Tbh
The moderator also shared that the community has grown fairly organically, “that is to say without much promotional effort (it was Subreddit of the Day a few years ago, though).”
“When I first subscribed to it circa 2017, there were probably around 20,000 here. Now, we gain on average about 25,000 new subscribers every quarter, though most posts tend to come from the same smallish subset of users,” the mod continued.
#10 Is There A Rome In Italy?
#11 Only Because Americans Pay For The Healthcare Of Europe
#12 “Why Would They Speak Spanish In Europe”
The group’s growth has also impacted how the mod team makes sure that the rules of the community are respected. “We’ve had to increase our reliance on automated tools/bots over time to assist in identifying potential troublemakers (users from certain rabidly pro-American subs often stop by to troll here, for example),” the moderator shared.
#13 A Wisconsin School District Says Students Can “Become Spoiled” With Free Meals And Opts Out Of Biden’s Free-Lunch Program
#14 ‘Texas Is Like Twice The Size Of Europe Alone’
#15 “China Bombed Pearl Harbor”
We also asked the moderator why they believe Americans are caught sharing ignorant posts online so often. “As Americans make up a plurality of users on Reddit (and on many other social media platforms) the quantity of suitable material is greater than for other nationalities,” they explained. “Though, I don’t think the proportion of ‘stupid/ignorant people’ is necessarily much different than you’d find in any other nationality.”
#16 “”Paddy” Is The N Word For Irish”
#17 “I Don’t Get Hungover”
#18 Vacations Are Only Interesting For About Four Days And Beyond That You’re Basically Just A Lazy Bum
“Due to the historical and geographical isolation of the USA, many Americans have erroneous/dated/stereotypical ideas about the rest of the world, which we find amusing,” the moderator continued. “Also, they will often be quite arrogant about their confidently incorrect opinions and have a tendency to double down when challenged, which makes it even more entertaining.”
#19 Save Australia
#20 They’re Still Staying On American Soil, Which Is As Free As It Gets
#21 Georgia Is A State Not A Country
So what is the community like in this subreddit? “Generally, the established members ‘get’ what the sub is about,” the moderator says. “It’s not about tarring all Americans with the same brush – we’re not criticizing all Americans (or the country itself, there are already subs for that). But we do engage in banter, which Americans often misinterpret and assume is genuine criticism aimed at Americans/America as a whole.”
#22 It Says West Coast On The Train. America
#23 On One Side, Single Digit. On The Other Side, Wacky Numbers, All With Lots Of Extra Numbers On The End
#24 Do Americans Have An Accent?
“Generally, people [who are offended by the group] become extremely defensive and argumentative, which we can usually w**d out fairly rapidly as a result,” the moderator continued. “It is a lighthearted sub, not a debate sub, and we try to keep it that way. In order to maintain the high quality of posts, we do have a large number of rules, which people sometimes complain about, but it simplifies the moderation process and reduces the amount of ‘lawyering’ arguments.”
#25 English Please, Reddit Is An American Website (German Subreddit Btw)
#26 Do Europeans Have A Spice Rack?
#27 “Jobs That Require Me To Speak More Than One Language Should Be Illegal!”
We also asked the moderator if they could share some of their personal favorite posts from the group. They noted that several “themes” pop up often, including tipping culture and heritage. Apparently, pizza is a common conversation topic in the group too, as well as healthcare. The mod also shared a couple funny examples of when “the ‘information bubble’ that many Americans exist in is confronted by the reality of the rest of the world.” You can find those posts here and here.
#28 “No Europe Is More Walkable Because It’s Socialist And Therefore Poor”
#29 Will My Right To Bear Arms Be Honoured In England Or Germany?
Finally, the moderator wanted to make it clear that this group is not out to bash the United States. “Many people think we moderators are somehow ‘anti-American’ simply for pointing out the dumb things some Americans sometimes say,” they told We. “In fact, we represent several nationalities, some of us are actually American ourselves or dual citizens (which is advantageous when trying to determine whether posts are ‘uniquely American’ or not). It’s also not ‘[Stuff]RepublicansSay’, as Democrats have their own brand of stupidity (as well as some overlap with Republicans, of course).”
#30 Europe Sucks
#31 “Inc*st Is Literally Celebrated In Europe So I’m Not Surprised At All ” (Talking About Completely Normal Age Gaps. Again)
#32 Electrical Outlets
#33 Turns Out She Was Spanish, Not White
#34 Norway Here I Come!
#35 Getting A Tattoo Of Your Ancestry.com Results
#36 There Should A Law Against This. This Is Socialism
#37 “The USA Has Not Ever Committed A Single War Crime!”
#38 Sad: 11 Year Old Arrested At School After Refusing To Stand For The Pledge
#39 “Why Do We Think Of Knights As Being On Horseback When Horses Are From North America”
#40 British Customs
#41 “The Cops In Our School”
#42 Nobody Takes A Train From Germany To France
#43 Extreme Restrictions On Free Speech
#44 “Who Would Be Paying For All The Food”
#45 Don’t You Miss Owning A Car?
#46 2 In 1: What Is A Litre & The English Language Is Owned By The United States!
#47 “Are Y’all Really That Discriminatory? I Can Feel Hatred Burning Through Generations”
#48 Sas: Come To America Where Our Dialects Are So Different Some Count As Completely Different Languages
#49 “Sad Truth”
#50 A 5k Marathon Isn’t A 5 Mile Run It’s A 3 Mile Run
#51 Did You Know Our Servers Survive On Your Tipping Kindness?
#52 “Real English Is The American English And British English Is A Dialect”
#53 In Boston We Are Irish
#54 “I’m 38.52% Japanese”
#55 Spain Has 90% White People And Has A Tradition That Has Outfits Exactly Like The Kkk
#56 I Was So Dehydrated In Europe. USA For Life
#57 “There Are Different Laws To Be Considerate Of, And Dialects, And Store Chains, Etc”
#58 “France Is Younger Than The United States”
#59 “People In England Don’t Realize Their S***ty Little Country Is Only As Big As Just Minnesotta”
#60 “USA Wins 1-1”
#61 “Its Not French, Its From Wisconsin”
#62 On A Post About British People Using British Slang – “Y’all Have The Worst Version Of English”
#63 My “Medium” Drink. Are They Downsizing The Drink Sizes Everywhere?
#64 “Dear France … Riot Like It’s 1776!”
