Many of us try on many identities as we grow up. There are many phases one can have: a Tamagotchi phase, an emo/scene phase, a fedora phase – you name it. Some people even go through their looking-like-a-mob-boss phase.
Whatever it is, it often makes folks cringe and want to hide the evidence of that time in the deepest of voids. However, some people are brave enough to share their embarrassing moments with the rest of the world. The subreddit Blunder Years is the perfect place for that, as it has over a million netizens sharing the pics from their childhood and teen years where they thought they looked their very coolest, yet actually were anything but.
We reached out to social science researcher Karla McLaren, M.Ed. She’s an author and an emotions and empathy expert, who believes that even negative emotions like shame and embarrassment can help guide us into self-awareness.
McLaren told us more about how sharing cringe-worthy memories can help us overcome insecurities and shared the pitfalls of revisiting embarrassing blunders of the past. Read her expert insights below:
More info: Empathy Academy | Emotion Dynamics
#1 The First Photo Is When We Were All Around 13 Years Old. Last Is At My Friend’s Wedding Last Year
#2 A Home Perm. I Had Several. This Was One Of Them
#3 When I Was Nine, I Insisted On Being A Homeless Enron Employee For Halloween. The Stubble Is Mascara
The resurgence of nostalgia doesn’t seem to be going away soon. We love to remember our favorite movies, TV shows, characters, and toys, but nostalgia is often only about the good things. We tend not to want to remember things that confused us, brought us pain, or made us feel embarrassed.
Yet we’re okay with some embarrassment. The Blunder Years subreddit walks the fine line between hurtful embarrassing memories and relatable embarrassment perfectly. Folks share photos from their past to, as the subreddit’s bio puts it, “laugh and regret together.”
#4 2008 I Was Sooo Proud Of My Hair 😹
#5 Mistaken For A Substitute Teacher At Least Once In Junior High
#6 Mullet, Skinny Leather Tie, Grade 9 Me Was A Vision. Of Something
We spoke with emotions and empathy expert Karla McLaren about how the impact of sharing embarrassing moments from our childhood and teen years with others impacts our mental health. “Memory is a strange thing,” she says. “It’s not an accurate record of the past, and each time we replay a memory, we change it.”
However, McLaren claims that there are both positives and negatives in remembering our cringey memories. “Sharing past experiences can be very healthy if you’re looking to find the humor or the growth you’ve experiencedsince then. But if you’re revisiting it and increasing your sense of dread or pain, it can be counterproductive.”
#7 I Still Have To Hear My Dad Trash My Mom For Letting Me Choose These Rainbow Glasses…but I Loved Them
#8 14yo Me In 2004… Thats What I Wore While Tearing Down The Old Trailer…. New Trailer In The Back
#9 This Was A Photoshoot I Did In 2010
That’s why McLaren warns people to be careful when reminiscing about their regrettable past. “Focusing on what you learned and how you’ve overcome difficult things can be very healing, but you do have to take care!” Remember: as long as you’re revisiting things that only make you laugh or cringe with humor, it’s all good.
#10 Got My Hair & Makeup Done At Libby Lu At The Mall For My Birthday. I Thought I Was So Cool
#11 My Boyfriend And His Mom In 1992
#12 My Father Left Behind A Legacy Of Cool And I Am Letting Him Down
As teens and pre-teens, we have lots of insecurities: we think our noses are crooked, our hair is the wrong color, or our feet too big. Looking back at ourselves during that formative time might help us overcome some of them. “Sharing your clumsy, silly, or shame-inducingblunders has a kind of daylighting effect,” McLaren notes.
#13 1989 I Was So Excited For The New Recycling Program To Start That I Wanted To Be Recycling For Halloween
#14 On My Way To See The Jonas Brothers
#15 2012 – 10/11 Year Old Me With Jeffree Star In Toronto 😭😭😭
According to McLaren, one of the best ways to deal with shame is to be open about it. “This helps you because you’re not keeping secrets from yourself,” she explains. “But it also helps others to see you do it, so that maybe they can bring some light and fresh air to their own very human blunders. It can also help you and everyone else laugh, lighten up, and create closerbonds,” the emotions and empathy expert says.
#16 1991, Off To My High School Graduation Ceremony
#17 ‘Glamour Photos’ From 2003 (I Was 13)
#18 Twenty Years Ago I Was In A Screamo Band. Now, I’m 40
When embarrassing moments like the ones in this list are put on the internet for everyone to see, it’s important how we frame that embarrassment. “If people are humorous and lighthearted (and not treating the embarrassed person as a target), it can lighten up the whole experience for everyone,” McLaren says.
“But if the embarrassment is being used to mock, shame, or bring another personlow, then it’s just exposing, unkind, and often abusive. It really depends on the context and the intention.”
#19 I Went To School Like This Everyday For Months. I Had Zero Friends
#20 Thankfully I Grew Into My Fave
#21 What 12-Year-Old Me Considered Peak Fashion
This generation, it seems, is doing just fine with embarrassment and shame. The recent “Rejection therapy” trend is all about people going out of their comfort zone and getting used to their anxieties around it. People are going aroundand asking to speak into a plane’s intercom or to take a nap at the mattress store and thus becoming insensitive to the word “No.”
#22 Dressing Like This To Play The Sims 2 By Myself
#23 This Is How I Dressed Every Day Of Middle School And Some Of High School, Because I Loved Mob Movies And Frasier. I Am Loath To Use This Sub, Because I Still Think I Ate. 🤣
#24 I Was 14, The Rapper 50 Cent Was My Idol, My Mom Took The Picture
Mental health experts say that it’s similar to exposure therapy. You go into a controlled environment and face your fears head-on. Psychotherapist Rachel Goldbergtold Bustlethat it “[reduces] the intensity of the fear response and [promotes] confidence.” Who knows, maybe sharing that embarrassing childhood pic may help you overcome an insecurity too?
#25 2011 Homecoming
#26 Showed Up To Homeschool Group In A Homemade Narwhal Costume
#27 Halloween 1997, I Insisted On Going As A Generic Can Of Whipped Cream And Mom Delivered:
In the end, everybody gets embarrassed about something. According to Kristin Neff, an associate professor at the University of Texas at Austin’s Department of Educational Psychology, when we’re self-aware and don’t take our embarrassing moments so seriously, we start to understand that everybody fails at some point. “Everyone struggles. This is what it means to be human,”she said.
#28 My Wife Kickin’ It With Her Dad In The Early 90s
#29 Feeding The Tamagotchis While Playing Habbo Hotel
#30 There’s No Need For How Much I Spent On Skinny Jeans And White Studded Belts Between 2009 And 2012
What about you, Pandas? What kind of blunders do you think you could bring to the table? We’ve covered the Blunder Years subreddit many times in the past, but it seems like there can never be enough awkward stories, huh? So, if you want to see more embarrassing pics from people’s childhoods, head overhere,here, andherefor more!
#31 Seventh Grade – I Cut My Own Hair And Borrowed Dad’s Cow Tie
#32 Took Me A Year To Grow A Full Jewfro In The 6th Grade…in 2006
#33 Yall Have Blunders, But Do You Have Anime Convention Going J-Fashion Loving Weeb Blunders?
#34 I Was A Scene Girl And I’m Not Ashamed
#35 Me And My Sister Around 2007. She Was The Scene Queen Of Myspace And I Just Wanted To Be Included In My Big Sisters Pictures
#36 10 Year Old Me In My Hannah Montana Wig 😭
#37 Prom 2012. Yes, I Like Sum 41
#38 My Mom Sent Me These Photos From My Elementary School 50’s Dance/Event. I Knew I Looked Fly, But Not This Fly. Circa ~2005
#39 2008, This Was My Everyday Winter Coat & Casual Hair
#40 My Future Mother-In-Law Made 11 Year Old Me Pose With Some Zucchini She Grew Because She Was Proud Of It (1997). The “Zucchini Photo” Is Now Infamous In Our House
#41 All Dressed Up For The School Dance…
#42 Convinced I Was Cool And Gangster
#43 When I Was 30 I Had A Pontiac Fiero Kit Car That I Used To Tell People Was A Real 25th Anniversary Lamborghini Countach. I Also Used To Pose For Photoshoots With It
#44 The Photo That Haunted Me For Decades
#45 2008/2024…i Put Holes In My Ears For The “Scene”
#46 Me And My Best Friend When We Were 17. I Had The Fattest Crush On Her For Years And Only Eventually Ended Up Dating Her For A Week
#47 Guess Which One I Am LOL, 18 Year Old Me
#48 2005/6. Believed I Was Part Of Kings Of Leon And Cut My Own Fringe With A Stanley Knife. Wow
#49 8th Grade Graduation, 2 Months After A Teacher Tried To Get Me Expelled For Having Blue Hair
#50 In 1996, I Was 12 And Got To Have Glamour Shots Done. 💁🏼♀️
#51 19-Year-Old Driver’s License Picture Went Hard
#52 I Am Not Scene Do Not Ever Call Me That
#53 From 15-19 I Didn’t Leave The House Without A Guitar, Yes, I Was That Guy At A Party. (Photo From 2010)
#54 I Thought I Was Peak Cool At This Moment In 2006
#55 Taping My Friend To The Wall And Seeing How Many Of Us We Can Fit In Conjoining Doors Of Hotel Room
#56 I Had This Awful “Beard Without A Mustache” Look For Years Longer Than I Should’ve (Which Is Zero)
#57 I Really Thought I Was A Myspace Queen
#58 The Year Was 2011. This Kid Taught Me What Heartbreak Was. LOL
#59 My Friend Made This For Me When I Was In High School At Some Point. I Truly Thought It Was The Most Xd Wrar Thing Of All Time. Also Why Did I Dress Like That
#60 It’s 2005. Guess How Many Viruses I Could Fit On This Bad Boy?
#61 2008 Wasn’t Real
#62 When Clinton Was Impeached, My Dad Made 4-Year-Old Me Pose With The Newspaper
#63 In Everything But Physical Form, I Was A Wolf. Arf!
#64 17 Year Old Me Thought Getting My Hands And Knuckles Tattooed Was Peek Coolness
#65 Circa 2001. I Thought I Was Too Cool For Family Photos
#66 Young Me Going To My First Concert And Wanting To Be The Ultimate Alt Girlie
#67 2012, Aged 16 And Thought We Were The Most Indiest Of Girls With College’s Borrowed Fisheye Lens
#68 Kept Reposting This On My Story When I Was 14 Thinking It Was The Key To Comedy
#69 These Photos Still Haunt Me
#70 We Liked Twilight Before It Was Cool 🧛♂️
#71 My Mom Convinced Me To Dye My Hair Blonde And Take A Picture With My Teacher In High School 2007
#72 I Went Like This To School At 15yo, And Genuinely Didn’t Understand Why I Was Bullied
#73 I Was 17 And Completely Convinced That I Was The Panic Pixie Dream Girl
#74 2016 – Obsessed With Submarines And Not Very Well Liked At School
#75 16, In A Bar, Sitting On Top Of It… With A Cigarette. Terrible LOL 🫣
#76 You’re Welcome
#77 Midwest Emo Had A Hold On Me
