Certain traits make a man instantly attractive to a woman. It could be his strong jawline, broad shoulders, or the way he carries himself with sheer slick confidence.
On the flip side, there are specific male behaviors that would instantly repel any sensible female. These characteristics came to light in a recent Reddit thread, where the ladies shared their biggest turnoffs in men. Responses ranged from driving like a maniac to supporting Andrew Tate.
Gentlemen, if you’re currently searching for your perfect life partner, be sure not to possess these qualities.
#1
The whole “I don’t read books” thing with this weird pride about it. I mean, you don’t have to be a literature professor, but being proud of ignorance is just… no.
#2
Constantly speaking over me and belittling my opinions. An adult man who cannot disagree respectfully is a red flag.
#3
Animal cruelty.
#4
Being rude to others for no valid reason.
MrDeviantish:
Grandma: Good manners won’t open any doors for you, but bad manners will make sure they stay closed.
#5
How they treat women they find unattractive. As a woman on the receiving end of this it’s a huge indicator into what kind of person they are.
kinziemclovin:
I like the quote “if you’re only respecting women you’re attracted to, you don’t respect women.”
pfeffercorp:
Oh god, yes. As a bit of a fatty-uggo myself, I always wondered why pretty women are okay with their boyfriend/husband/whatever talking smack about women they don’t find attractive. It’s like, I might have an ugly face, but it sounds like your man has an ugly heart.
#6
Racism, misogyny, homophobia, transphobia, religious chauvinism, basically being a dumb bigot.
#7
Watches Andrew Tate or other in his genre.
StevieEastCoast:
The visible sigh of relief and seeing the shoulders relax when you make fun of Joe Rogan or Andrew Tate on a first date is one of life’s purest pleasures.
SinkHoleDeMayo:
There’s a FB group I’m in and some guys there bash women, and when the women come in and say s**t about how Tate (and the like) is an idiot and listening to him is a red flag, the guys will say women hate accountability (seems to be a thing on the internet lately) and that’s why they disagree with Tate, or they’re wrong, whatever.
I find it amusing because women are literally there to say what they like and dislike, and these guys are acting like they know better than women. Doesn’t take a genius to figure out why they’re single and can’t get laid and yet they continue to buy into that bullshit when it definitely hasn’t improved their results.
#8
A man that cant take intitiative. Like manchildren. The weaponized incompetance or just plain ignorant incompetence. I want a man, a grown a*s adult, not another dependent.
#9
The moment they get worried about looking “gay”. I find nothing more instantly repulsive than someone being so insecure about their own masculinity.
#10
Embrace MAGA. It shows me that we have little in common regarding ethics and tolerance for others.
#11
Driving like a maniac and being rude to people he thinks are beneath him.
Fair_Package8612:
The driving thing is my biggest one! I need someone who puts my safety over trying to impress me with how he thinks he can drive like a race car driver in a damn video game.
#12
Not knowing how to do basic tasks like laundry, cooking, managing their own time etc. Adding to that, when they know how to do this s**t but don’t do it. Vomit.
ETA: Talking about people who don’t have any mental health issues or chronic illnesses, just straight up lazy people…
#13
If he has a bad temper.
esoteric_enigma:
Definitely a huge red flag. That temper will be turned on you eventually, if you stick around long enough.
#14
Sexism, treating women as lesser.
#15
Condescension and arrogance. Those things are different from confidence. A confident man wants to lift others up.
No-Establishment7161:
Acting like he’s God’s gift to women when he can’t even hold a basic conversation. Confidence is hot—arrogance is cringe.
#16
Acting “macho” or “alpha” or whatever…it’s just embarrassing.
hkric41six:
Wait but is scientifically proven that all woman immediately want to have s*x with the alpha male of the pack! Just like those wild wolves we are not at all related too, and despite humans not being pack animals!
Dr_Identity:
I honestly find it fascinating how people try so hard to cover their insecurities by overcompensating with things like this, not realizing that when they act overly arrogant/dominant/controlling towards anyone with an ounce of insight and/or experience with insecure people, they might as well be wearing a neon t-shirt that says “I am so scared right now!”
#17
Someone who can’t respect boundaries.
Trying to push you into being more than friends, trying to get you to have another drink, trying to make you divulge more details on your life than you like, trying to initiate s*x when you’ve said you’re tired….it’s insufferable at all levels.
#18
Unintelligent. No sense of humor.
#19
A man who belittles hobbies that women enjoy. That kind of mockery screams insecurity.
#20
Gawking over other women while you’re with them… total turnoff!
#21
Blacking out EVERYTIME he drinks and being a nuisance in public when drunk. Just ew.
xavPa-64:
My friend dated this guy a few years ago who drank so much he passed out at the bar counter and they kicked him out. She was soooo embarrassed, but he just laughed it off the next day like it was nothing.
#22
If he has a child/children that he isn’t consistently in their lives.
#23
If they start shooting out loads of bad sexual jokes as a way of communicating their discomfort around women they find attractive.
#24
Always talking about how much money he has.
#25
A man who calls his exes crazy. One ex is crazy? Okay. Multiple exes are crazy? Absolutely not.
#26
I have a list, lol, but the thing that gets me the quickest is a guy who is negative 24/7. Every single guy I talked to on a dating app that was like this made me want to just run the other direction and not look back. I know we all have our moments and its understandable but holy s**t within the first five seconds and it’s a barrage about how bad their life is. Nothing positive at all.
#27
Calling women females or any sort of the very poorly masked insecurity marketed as “real masculinity”.
#28
Casual cruelty.
If they’re a toxic mama’s boy.
Lack of empathy for others.
#29
Poor hygiene! Bad teeth. Bad breath. Soiled clothing. Pants that look like they haven’t been washed in ages. Hair sticking out of ears and noses. Dirty fingernails*. Unkempt beard. Greasy, hair, dandruff. The sight of underwear with dirty rims. Like ugh. You’re not climbing in top of me!
And please for the love of god, learn how to wipe you a**es. Only a baby should be sporting a skidmark in their underwear!
* Unless you’re coming home hot sweaty and a little musty from a hard day at work, – Otherwise, I don’t mind a little mansweat which I call clean musk – that’s s**y; that’s pheromones. If I like you, I’ll probably like your natural smell.
Otherwise take a shower, brush your teeth, change your drawers, wear a nice cologne, and I’ll be on you like white on rice!
#30
Any man who says “that’s not for men” referring to literally anything. Just shows low self-esteem.
#31
Not being able to be fully present with me. I don’t really enjoy the view of the back of a persons phone every time we’re together.
#32
Lack of respect. Period.
#33
Disrespecting women or a specific community, even casually.
#34
If he is aligned with the far right and likes Elon Musk.
#35
Anger issues.
#36
A big truck, especially jacked up. You know what that means.
#37
Someone who brags, talks over people, rude to service industry people. One or any of these and I’ve lost interest completely.
#38
Argumentative or mansplainy
(Ron Swanson voice): “I know more than you”.
#39
Trying to make you jealous.
#40
Codependent, low emotional intelligence, bad hygiene, bad finances, doesn’t take care of their physical appearance, mean, selfish, lacking in accountability and integrity.
#41
Lack of emotional intelligence.
Any discussion of crypto.
#42
Sexualizing everything about you specially during early stages of dating, low efforts towards you, judgemental, talks s**t about others, cant get their s**t together, can’t communicate, always complaining.
#43
If he’s close-minded, intolerant, ignorant, that’s a no. A very big no.
Also, if he objectifies me or any women he knows or doesn’t know…Bye little boy.
#44
When he’s rude to waitstaff, it doesn’t matter how hot he is, that’s a wrap. Or when he talks only about himself and never asks a single question back. Also bad hygiene. You don’t need to smell like a cologne ad, soap is free.
#45
Long fingernails.
Wonderful-Duck-6428:
And toenails.
#46
Not taking accountability.
#47
When they randomly spit.
#48
Not wanting to use a c****m.
#49
Too much cologne.
#50
Being sexually promiscuous – partaking or being open to hooking up/casual relationships/fwbs etc.
Personally, no thank you x.
#51
Negging.
#52
Arrogance and excessive sarcasm.
#53
Tearing down other women even if it’s subtle. Like if a man starts complaining about “white women” or his ex. It’s just a form of misogyny.
#54
Not being in control of his emotions. Calm and rational men are GOLD.
#55
Well:
Inattentiveness. One of the most universally attractive things in a man is attentiveness. Example: he’s in a shared space with men and women and notices, without it being pointed out to him, that dishes are being cleared or the space is being picked up/cleaned and he quietly steps in and does his part with no prompting or fanfare. Bonus points if he makes the other men participate/calls them out for not helping. So, instantly unattractive? A man who ignores the labor going on around him but benefits from it.
Mansplaining and talking over me/interrupting me. I know Reddit hates the term mansplaining but it’s real. Men who step in and try to explain life or life experiences to grown women who know about those situations as well or better than they ever will and they approach it like they’re delivering breaking news. Men who say things like “be careful, they’ll harass you there.” In other news, water is wet! Harassment is everywhere, I don’t have to be warned, I’m already aware and prepared. Before this conversation, I was harassed two different times! Or something like that. Spend less time telling women the world is dangerous and spend more time on trying to end the danger, starting with yourselves. Then, when I am speaking, let me finish. Don’t talk over me like you don’t even hear me. I instantly can’t stand the men who do this.
#56
Teeth that look like they haven’t been brushed in a long time.
#57
A man that’s always arguing with women.
#58
Horrible conversation and no interests or hobbies. I had a guy who would ask me literally every day if my day was productive and if I asked what made his day productive, he never answered. It’s like he only had one question to ask and that was it. No talking about hobbies, children, the community. He didn’t know how to ask diverse questions and he certainly didn’t know how to answer them. It lasted about 3 days. More men need to learn how to be likeable!
#59
When they constantly talk about how poor they are. I don’t care about how much a man makes, but if he constantly calls attention to it, it ruins the mood. There are plenty of free dates out there and I’m happy to just chill and listen to music and go to the park, and even drink water and not alcohol. But if someone makes it their personality we can’t actually enjoy the moment together. Just be present.
#60
Making it seem like they are the prize and I should be lucky to be with them. ✌🏼.
#61
For me it’s arrogance, being a bully/mean, and a lack of empathy. I also find it unattractive if they have a very negative view on people and project it onto them. Like, it doesn’t matter if someone does a nice act, they will be 100% confident in their assumption that they didn’t mean well.
Lastly, if they run with their assumptions/have c**p communication because of it.
#62
Smoking cigarettes.
#63
Being super flirty with everyone. Such a turn off.
#64
Discussing one’s ex-wife or ex-girlfriend in any disrespectful manner is gross. They loved that person at some point or felt something for them; why diminish that? It’s such a turn off.
#65
Nonchalant. I am not gonna 🤸🏼♀️ chase, beg (perform) so you can show me some affection, f**k that.
#66
Physically – when they’ve worked out too much and I can see the veins poking out of their arms. It grosses me out.
Emotionally – man-child.